

Carla Friesen / Carla Friesen Counselling & Coaching / ©2020 carlafriesen
- Mar 29, 2021
- 2 min
Personality or Stress Response?
I feel like parenting a child with chronic pain has changed me in so many ways. I have definitely grown in my empathy, wisdom, and flexibility. But I also feel like I have become more lazy. More selfish. And more anxious. Let’s break these down a little because I think I am probably not alone… Feeling lazy
• Don’t want to fold the laundry (or do any household chores)
• Want to watch tv
• Don’t want to exercise
• Tired of thinking about what to make for dinner all the ti

Carla Friesen / Carla Friesen Counselling & Coaching / ©2020 carlafriesen
- Mar 23, 2021
- 3 min
Flexible Expectations Make the Journey a Little Easier
I used to think Greta might become an engineer. Or a lawyer. She was great at math and science. Better than anyone else in the family. She won awards, was well-rounded, was captain of the volleyball team, faster than most of the boys in PE, was an impressive critical thinker, an amazing artist and an entrepreneur. We marveled at how she could probably be good at any job she wanted. In fact we used to dare her to get a B on her report card. She wouldn’t do it. It almos

Carla Friesen / Carla Friesen Counselling & Coaching / ©2020 carlafriesen
- Mar 17, 2021
- 2 min
Where do you Focus when Navigating a Storm?
Have you ever driven on a highway during an intense storm? It’s hard to see, vehicles are whizzing past and you wonder if you should just pull over. And then you remember, just focus on the line. I usually get in the slow lane and focus on the white line on the shoulder of the road. The winds and rain might shift direction, vehicles might change speed and come too close, but I can count on the line because it doesn’t change. It will get me to where I want to go, however

Carla Friesen / Carla Friesen Counselling & Coaching / ©2020 carlafriesen
- Mar 17, 2021
- 3 min
Out with the Old, In with the New
This weekend we are moving Greta’s room from downstairs back to upstairs. Painting, decluttering, going through old stuff. It has certainly been quite the year. Covid aside. Last year at this time Greta had an intense need for new. Like she was done with the old. Period. She had been taking the steps to become more functional for about 3 months or so and she didn’t want anything around her that reminded her of her years in bed 24/7. Including me. Like she even needed

Carla Friesen / Carla Friesen Counselling & Coaching / ©2020 carlafriesen
- Mar 15, 2021
- 3 min
The Crazy Things we do to Distract from Pain
On Saturday Greta was in a lot of pain. She doesn’t have too many days lately where she needs my help to manage her pain. She has become pretty good at distracting herself when her pain flares. However, not on Saturday. She wanted to lay down in a dark room with ice, watch tv, and eat comfort food. And I did NOT want things to start spiraling down. So I gave her $20 and said she could go out and buy something. (Shopping is very motivating for her). Now I wouldn’t usually

Carla Friesen / Carla Friesen Counselling & Coaching / ©2020 carlafriesen
- Mar 10, 2021
- 3 min
Pain Education ~ A Tool for Getting on the Same Team
You might know a lot about chronic pain but does your child? Like the nuts and bolts of why chronic pain happens? It was very important for Greta and I to both learn about chronic pain so that we could be on the same team trying to manage it, rather than at odds with one another. Without knowing the mechanisms of chronic pain, it is hard to be motivated to even want to manage your pain ~ you would rather just stay in bed! Meeting with a pain specialist who had the time to r


Carla Friesen / Carla Friesen Counselling & Coaching / ©2020 carlafriesen
- Mar 4, 2021
- 3 min
At Ease, Soldier
I did a post a while back in my Facebook group asking whether people thought their child with chronic pain might be considered a “highly sensitive” child. The answer was, for the most part, yes. Most of us did think our child would also be classified as a “highly sensitive person.” Highly Sensitive people can be characterized as often living close to that fight or flight threshold. They have a nervous system that is regularly on high alert. They may feel emotion more deepl